Research backs up these observations and highlights some gendered dynamics:

• Women are 20% less likely to receive actionable feedback than men.
• Feedback provided to women is generally more vague, less tied to business outcomes, softened by a kindness bias and overly focused on their communication style.
• Men are more likely to receive insightful developmental feedback about their technical skills.

Common stereotypes of women being warmer, more emotional and less resilient fuel this gender divide, and stop managers from giving critical feedback to women out of fear of being hurtful. When I dig further with leaders on their hesitations, it’s almost always mostly about their own discomfort and fears about the conversation not going well. In fact, a recent study showed underperforming female employees receive less truthful feedback than their male counterparts, and more “white lies” to soften the blow!

Tips on how to master the feedback loop

Asking for, receiving and actioning constructive feedback is imperative to everyone’s career and leadership potential. Building self-awareness, understanding your skills development priorities and goal-setting all depend on it. And you just can’t build resilience and confidence without a habit of integrating a regular dose of critical and constructive feedback.

Here’s how to set yourself up to receive regular feedback:

• Ask for it: Make a habit of asking your team, manager, key stakeholders or clients for feedback regularly with specific questions that make it easier for them to reflect. Instead of asking, “do you have any feedback for me?”, ask “how could I have handled that stakeholder more effectively?”, “how did I show up in that meeting?”, or “what could I do next time to land that presentation more powerfully?”.
• Active listening (with your ears and body): Notice how your body responds to critical feedback and use that reaction to remind you to listen carefully without becoming defensive or interrupting. Show you’re open to hearing the feedback by asking questions to explore it further and thanking the person for taking the time to support your development.
• Ask for examples: Ask the person to provide specific examples of the behaviour they are addressing, so you can better understand what they are referring to.
• Reflect: Take some time to reflect on the feedback and think about how you can use it to improve your skills or performance.
• Develop an action plan: Outline the steps you will take to address the feedback. This could include setting goals, seeking additional support or guidance, or practicing specific skills.
• Follow up: After receiving feedback, follow up with the person to let them know how you are working to address the issue or to ask for additional guidance or support.

Giving constructive feedback:

• Context: Start with context for the feedback so the person receiving the feedback understands where it’s coming from.
• Be specific: Be specific about the observable behaviours you want to address and the implications of those behaviours. Avoid making generalisations or criticizing the person's character.
• Be timely: Provide feedback as soon as possible after the behaviour occurs, so the person has a clear understanding of what they did and why it was problematic.
• Seek alignment: Ensure the person receiving the feedback understands and agrees with the feedback before moving to actions. If agreement can’t be reached during that discussion, explore ways to reach agreement in the future. For example, additional feedback could be sought.
• Actions: Agree actions that one or both parties will take to act on the feedback.

Constructive feedback is a great opportunity for growth and development. By approaching feedback with a positive attitude and a willingness to learn, it becomes a valuable tool for improving your skills and achieving your goals.

Want first-hand tips and advice to master the feedback loop?

Future IM/Pact Founder and leadership coach, Yolanda Beattie, is hosting an online Leadership Lesson for our early career members on how to give and receive constructive feedback for self-development on 26 April. We encourage all women in the early stages of their career to join this interactive tutorial to learn practical feedback techniques and the right mindset and approach for success.